Koi Delta 8 Cart Review | Mellow But Unremarkable

The crew at Dab Connection share with me that I’ve gotten something of a reputation by now. When cartridges get sent to us for review, we sort them out to our reviewers in whatever state, in a process not unlike random chance. But when a cartridge rotates the me, Pete the Cartridge-Hater, you can almost hear the groan go up from that brand’s marketing department. Might I take this moment to reassure everyone that I rate cartridges by their own standards, objectively?

Koi is a brand we’ve visited before anyway, and they’ve been around a few years, so they have a solid rep. TR Sun liked their disposable oilpens, for one thing, so that’s a vote of confidence already. Today we’re reviewing Koi’s delta 8 THC vape cartridge, in the “Super Sour Diesel” variety. It retails at Koi’s own site for $29.99, or less per subscription rate, but never mind that. You’ll likely find Koi widely distributed across the US, as they’ve been established in the CBD and legal hemp products market for some time now – doubtless you will find a Koi gram out there at a cheaper price than what they sell to the public.

Pros:

Mellow flavor
Good potency
Unpretentious

Cons:

It is not as uplifting as a diesel strain should be
Feels synthetic
Lab sheets need better archiving

Recommendations: At this point, maybe Delta 8 is starting to feel almost played out. Perhaps moving on to THCA is in order? As for these carts, I’m sure there is a market for delta 8 vapes in the cheap-but-not-gas-station range, so Koi probably knows its customer base better than I do.

The Most Potent Strain of the Mildest Cannabinoid

I find it ironic that we go out of our way to make Delta 8, an altcan with half the strength of regular THC, and then use it in a strain like Super Sour Diesel because we really want that to hit us hard. It’s like a seven-year-old banging their fist on the bar demanding a Shirley Temple – with a double shot of grenadine this time because this is not amateur hour. I seek to become one with the couch; fetch me the legendary face-melter, Super Sour Diesel, but make it a Delta 8 because I still have work tomorrow.

The Koi packaging presentation is as basic as you can get. Every expense was spared in the simple cardboard printed one-piece containing a gram cart with rubber stops at either end. It dutifully threaded onto my trusty Doteco TIK20 (yep, still my fave!). The battery dutifully lit up to twinkling life and heated th oil at about 3.8V. I resolutely inhaled some dutiful puffs and noted that this was a better cartridge to me, anyway, because it’s so smooth.

I am pleased to report, in fact, that the majority of vape cartridges I have encountered lately have backed down on the harsh, artificial terpenes and the choking-sweet candy flavors. I’ve been finding cartridge flavors much more tolerable lately, as long as I avoid the sugar diabetes option. But even now, I sometimes have the sensation of vaping perfume.

Koi Delta 8 Cartridges Deliver Potency

I tried, and failed, to locate the exact COA lab test sheet for this particular product. Koi’s website has lab tests posted here and there, but not fully covered for every product. Normally I’d make a bigger stink about that, but this is Koi we’re talking about, I’m sure I’m in good hands. I need not question the potency – maybe in the ~80% range? – because I feel it after a few puffs. Even though it’s delta 8, enough delta 8 at high enough concentration starts feeling like D9THC.

So I have no complaints about the potency, and what remarks I do have may be subjective just to me. Despite this being a Sativa, it couch-locks me hard. I’m at the opposite end of the spectrum from “motivated” and “inspired.” Instead, I’m foggy and forgetful, and I’m in the mental headspace between whatever Beanie Babies think about and the sound of a rotating potato baking in a microwave. BUT this is one vape I can take to nighty-night, I can say that. Whenever I hear about people who have trouble falling asleep due to intrusive thoughts, I think of recommending a Diesel strain cartridge. Can’t have intrusive thoughts if your brain is just “buuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhh…”

With that said, I’m still a bit spoiled with the full spectrum effects I normally enjoy from flower and extracts. This is not full spectrum anything, and Koi doesn’t really promise you more than delta 8 molecules converted out of the nearest CBD, slapped together with botanical terpenes they had lying around. The result feels less like a cannabis extract and more like a synthetic patch made to help me kick the stuff.

Koi Gets the Job Done

Since Koi has been around for so long and an interstate shipper, too, they are dogged by black market knock-offs. But this experience has shown that genuine Koi carts straight from the source live up to what you’d expect from a cart. It works. It doesn’t go out of its way to do anything fancy, but work it, indeed, does. Do I recommend them? Koi’s altcan cartridges have been a mainstay in states with low legalization support, so that alone is something to like. But in the end, Koi isn’t doing anything to stand out from the million other D-8 carts out there.

That link again; find Koi delta 8 cartridges here. Readers, how are your experiences with Koi? Fish for feedback here in the comments, or swim over to our forum.